Obviously I have not been blogging much these days. Things have slowed down for multiple reasons. Some personal and some professionally. I often feel like I have said all there is to be said on the subject of authentic portrayals and representation of paraplegics, and to a lesser degree all those with a disAbility, in previous posts. That was the main reason I transferred all of my blog posts from the now defunct GoDaddy blog servers and over here to WordPress.
But this is a new year. And despite last years’ slowing down I have been working on a short film. I have been encouraged and most often rejected making documentary films, and especially any that would feature yours truly. I am a behind the camera guy. And I like storytelling. Fictional stories are much more fun to create and write. That is what I have been doing for 25+ years. But since my becoming a paraplegic, which this April will be 20 years, it has an incredible journey that has not produced as I was sure it would by this time in my career and life. Which for many of those years, they were one and the same! And like with many of you in my life and career there have been many ups and downs. And thanks in large part to the entertainment industry, much of my career has been dismissed, ignored, or completely unnoticed because I have insisted that as a paraplegic filmmaker, in which I create a paraplegic character in the starring role, that I only hire a paraplegic actor for that paraplegic role. To answer the industry objection that there are no name recognized paraplegic actors to carry a film to box office success, I have written strong co-starring characters that are able bodied and more of a dual starring roles in order to attract a name recognized able bodied actor. I also create stories that are universal rather than ones that would only attract the disAbility community. This creates the “golden egg” of most businesses, including the independent film business of reach a niche market with universal appeal. My film projects provides the authentic paraplegic/persons with a disAbility portrayal and representation, along with commercial appeal for mainstream audiences.
There have been countless objections and obstacles to producing such entertaining films. I have met them all with answers and proof that such films would be worthy of success. But never getting an opportunity to prove it. It is all on paper. It has been proven in the business plans and presentations that I have written but I have failed to find those that will give me more than a polite, “good luck. It is a very interesting and noble idea”. This without even looking at the written proof, the screenplays, the business plans complete with the details of the authentic niche with mainstream appeal – marketing and advertising campaigns – and financial projections.
This is just an outline of all the trials and challenges that accompanied this 25+ year journey. Along with the personal roller coaster that I have been on it is almost unbelievable. And when people get to know me, or those that have been with me through it all, find it is incredible and wonder how I have gone on and on and on. For me it has never been a question. It is my passion and truly believing that I can and will make it happen. This genuine passion for both storytelling on film and the dedication to bringing this extremely underserved minority, an authentic and non-stereotypical representation to the entertainment industry, is what most people tell me they feel when they talk to me about my career and life! I cannot argue with them on that. I am very passionate and dedicated to my film work and the advocacy work that I have had to do because of the exclusion of people with a disAbility in the entertainment industry.
So with the prompting, encouragement and convincing that telling this story of my life in, or trying to be in, the entertainment industry will be an inspiration to others – not only to those trying to do what I have dedicated some much of my blood, sweat and tears but to those with a disAbility in general. And those who are requesting me to do this feel that it is something they and many others would like to see as well.
So I am working on it right now. Although I am currently struggling with how to present the film. I am currently writing it as a first person narration. But after hearing myself narrating in a small video clip I helped put together for my sister, I heard a lot of my speech difficulties that are still present since my strokes in 2011 and 2012. So while I am already not comfortable in me being the focus, in front of the camera, and doing a documentary short film, I am self-conscious about this speech impediment and therefore considering writing it in the third person to get someone else to narrate it. But how does that look? I am the writer, director, editor, producer of a film about myself but not narrating it?
In addition, I am working on ways to make this autobiographic, documentary film that are usually done in a methodical, educational cookie cutter way – entertaining! I can only hope that this will be a success. Since the entertainment industry has not been interested in my fictional work this might be the only tangible proof that I can show after over two decades of passionately working at making my dreams a reality.
This is a new year. Time for new thinking and a new film!